empathy Archives - Cup and Quill

Why We Should Talk to Strangers

September 13, 2020

A Walk in the Park A research trip took me to the Birmingham Civil Rights Institute in Birmingham, Alabama. The park across the road was the site of some of the worst acts of civil rights violence. It is now an important site of memory. Its history is retold through sculptures and other art installations throughout. It was a July morning so I decided to stroll through the park before it got too hot. I had paused to study a sculpture depicting vicious, snarling dogs when I heard a voice behind me. “Nothing has changed you know.” I turned around to see

Why Being Not Okay, is Okay

June 6, 2018

It is okay not to be okay. This I have learned from two friends and my significant other who have lost children to terrible diseases in the recent past. I don’t know that anyone can truly “get” the enormity of the grief that comes with losing a child unless one has actually lost a child. However, I believe my friends and partner when they talk about how heavy that grief is at times. It sounds unbearable and yet it must be borne. People say the most insensitive things to parents who’ve lost children. More often than you’d imagine, people (and

Guest Blog: A Letter to a Friend by Michael Cameron

April 29, 2018

This week my significant other lost his 17-year-old son–a cancer warrior. Grief is a suffocating, all encompassing emotion that I am just now realizing I know nothing about. My friend Michael, though, does know a thing or two about grief. His girlfriend, Colleen, who was also my junior high friend and track teammate, was murdered by an ex-boyfriend in 2015. Michael wrote the following blog entry sometime thereafter. I have found and continue to find Michael’s post one of the best things I’ve ever read about grief. Only now, though, am I turning to it for my own purposes rather than

“I Can Only Imagine”

April 1, 2018

“I Just Can’t Imagine” When bad things happen to other people, we often say “I just can’t imagine….” Usually, we say this to acknowledge that something bad has happened and to express sympathy or regret. However, the phrase “I just can’t imagine” does neither of those things. In fact, saying “I just can’t imagine” is a bit of a cop-out. Our language needs to align more closely with our intentions. So, instead of saying “I just can’t imagine,” we should say “I can only imagine.” Whatever our intentions, words speak for themselves. “I just can’t imagine” is code for “I

Category: empathy

Why We Should Talk to Strangers

Why Being Not Okay, is Okay

Guest Blog: A Letter to a Friend by Michael Cameron

“I Can Only Imagine”